It's a Zoo Out There

We went to the Portland, Oregon area for Michelle's appointment at Shriner's hospital this past week. Before the appointment we took the kids to the zoo.

Lent and Valentines

Here are some photos from our week. I'm not exactly sure how Lent is represented here, but Valentine's gets an icon or two.

Lewis Meets the English Language

Here's a little selection of Lewisisms (like solecisms, but different):

After reading Henry Explores the Mountains: Mom, what happens when you fall into a travalanche?

***

Elementary etymology: Mom, what does "pen" mean? ... Well, then, Mom, what does "cil" mean?

***

Understanding from the context...sort of: Dad, what does "hire" mean? I don't mean like a plane flies "hire" in the sky; I mean the sort of hire where you...um...where you bother someone who's working.

Concentration

Peter was reading Lord of the Rings to everyone. To be able to listen, I had brought my makeup out into the family room and was applying it in the big mirror. Nelly was watching, of course, all agog and hoping to do some gleaning. Lewis was opening and shutting a musical book (plays Silent Night when open, allows you to have a silent night when shut). Understandably, this started to get on Peter's nerves. "What's that?" he asked, not to say snapped. Nelly never took her eyes off my face. "Makeup," she breathed, reverently.

One About Peter

Somniloquy: A talking in sleep; the talking of one in a state of
somnipathy. (Thanks, Dad.)

Last night Peter and I had an interesting conversation. I was operating in that delusional and paranoid frame of mind that sometimes descends on mothers in the hours between midnight and four, and he was suffering the aftereffects of a season of politician-watching. But see for yourself.

Me, suddenly coming what I conceived to be wide-awake around 3:30 in the morning, and convinced I smelled burning plastic: Do you smell that hot smell?

Peter: mmmmumhumderdawiganBob Dole.

Me: What?

Peter, adopting a didactic tone and beginning to wave his hands: Well, the humterdumterdiga [I'm improvising here, but it was something like this] and the party chair is....

Me: You're asleep.

Peter, looking at me severely: I'm not asleep. See, what's going on is that both parties are trying for Bob Dole's gubernatorial seat.

Me: You are asleep. Do you smell anything hot?

Peter: No.

***

I (probably in my sleep) then went sniffing all over the house, and then we both relapsed into peaceful slumber.

Four Eyes...no, Eyebrows

It was a particularly bad thing that Nelly found that lip-liner in the bottom of the cart as we trucked around Wal-mart. To begin with, she thought it was eyeliner. Plus, her aim's no good. By the time we arrived at the car, Nelly was wearing four eyebrows, two of them pink.

And watch out for that Makeup Bug, 'cause when she bites, she bites hard. As if four eyebrows weren't enough for one day, about half an hour later I surprised the lipstick bandit in the bathroom, hastily (but capably enough) rezipping my makeup bag...which looked unusually light and thin in her hands. She confessed (between yells) that the rest of the makeup was "iiiiiin her puuuuuuuurse."

A Couple Friends

A couple of friends were in my home studio this week and I took a few quick shots of them. I thought you might like to see some of my recent lighting work.

Kids

Ron Paul in the morning...

Mona the incomparable

Beautiful Inge
Notorious Nelly

Loony Lewis

And yes, she's still at the table. I think she's spent half of her life there so far.

The Big Girls

What happens when you create unorthodox phrases:

Inge: Oh, Mommy, I want you to come see a beautiful picture-view.
Me, flattered, but projecting surprise: Oh, a beautiful picture of me? Really?
Inge: It's out my window in my room.
Me, getting it: Oh, a picture-view.
Inge, tickled: Nooooo, not a picture of me.

***
On second-hand possessions and the nature of being:

Nelly, very indignant, and presenting me with a size 3T sweatshirt: Mommy! Inge says this is hers.
Me: It used to be, but she grew out of it.
Nelly, fading into the other room: Inge, Mommy says you grew out of it, so it's mine. [Then as an afterthought, and very pious:] Because that's the way God made us.

***
On liking everything:

Inge: Mommy, do you want to know which of these paints are my favorites? The blue and green. And the purple. Oh, and the orange and pink and yellow.
Me: You mean all of them?
Inge, looking just a little sheepish and regrouping them several times with her hands: Yeah, I guess so. Well, I mean, I like the purple and the blue the very best. And the green and the pink because they're really nice and the yellow and....maybe...not the orange.

Let it Snow

Marriage Money Bomb

Well, it's that time again, folks. Ron and Carol have been married 51 years today. I saw them in person in Spokane yesterday.

Please donate at www.ronpaul2008.com

And read my photo essay about our trip to Spokane to see him here. If you like it vote for it at the bottom of the article. The more votes the better our chances of getting it published in JPGmag.

Here's a link to my YouTube video from the rally.

Some Photos

Sisters....
Nelly looking very spiffy in sunglasses that had just been found after a long period of being lost. Amazing what you find in the couch.

Yes, those shoes are on backwards.

"How restless lies the head that wears the crown." Solution: hold it instead, you'll sleep much better.

Been a while since we put up a picture of the two of us.

And the giant duck monster that haunts our bathroom.

And a photo Claire took of me taking pictures after Jon and Lindsey's wedding.

Another Nelly Video

Royals + Hobbit

Clever Nelly

Nelly had been in the restroom shouting "Mom, I'm dooooooonnnnne" over and over and over. Now you have to understand that Nelly is without parallel here. Her stamina is absolutely amazing. In the space of thirty seconds, she can repeat herself some five hundred times or so and louder every time, which is not good when I'm trying to put Mona to sleep, say. So, often, by the time I actually arrive to take care of business, I've heard the cry so many times that a little levity seems in order.

Me: Oh, you're done, are you?
Nelly: Yes. I'm done.
Me, reconstituting a really dead one: Oh, and all this time I thought you were Nelly.
Nelly, not getting it: I am Nelly.
Me, joyously recognizing that to her, this exploitation of the verb of being is actually still fresh and vibrant: But you said you were done.

Nelly took a moment to regroup and then, decisively: My bum is done, but my face is Nelly.

Moebius Strip

Scene: I'm in the kitchen peeling potatoes, like anyone would be in the five o'clock hour. There has been a real run of accidental injuries recently: every two minutes, sudden screams from the bedrooms, followed by cries of astonishment and disbelief. And yes, more of the same seems to be coming right down the pike.

Sudden screams offstage. Enter Nelly.

Nelly: Leeeewwis pinched me!

[Enter Lewis]

Me, beginning a prepared speech I had been working over along with the potatoes: There have been way too many accidents in there...et cetera...and you kids need to...et cetera...and so the next person who accidentally anything is gonna get...

Lewis: Excuse me, Mom? I pinched Nelly on purpose.

Me, taken up short: Oh. Why?

Lewis: Because she was kicking me with her knee.

Me: Nelly...?

Nelly, not much abashed, but also not screaming anymore: Because he was pinching me because I was kicking him, because....because....

All of which serves to illustrate that however smart your two-year-old may be, you'd better call a different key witness.

Very Sweet

Yes, I know, I've been blogging like a maniac today. Just one more, folks. One more to round things out, especially after all my cynical comments about germs and cat patookey:

Yesterday a friend called out of the blue and announced she had made us some dinner--sort of an overdue welcome to Mona, I gather. This, though lovely, happened to come on a week when I had my meals fairly well planned and we were already invited out to dinner on the night in question. Still, one can always use extra meals and be glad of them. Naturally I accepted with thanks. Today, Nelly woke up from her nap with a headache and fever, about two hours before we were supposed to leave for dinner with friends. Dinner with friends got cancelled, of course; but one half hour later, the dinner from friends arrived, right on schedule. The husband dropped it off, and he had been commissioned to pass along his wife's apologies that she hadn't been able to make us a salad.

But that was okay, because guess what I was supposed to contribute to the originally planned meal. Yep.

Anyway, Nelly's headache and fever subsequently evaporated, and she spent a happy evening playing; and all I can figure out is that God just wanted to plan our dinner for us.

Tuppence Had a Bath, or, What I did with the Rest of my Morning

Well, the sad sequel is as follows. Whatever else Tuppence may have had in mind with her monastic exercises, she was not only trying to cleanse her soul. No, there was more than that...shall I say, in arrears? (That's for my Roise relatives.)

And you know, I have come to realize that there are three main things that characterize motherhood: germs, delays, and surprising interruptions.

Cats are Strange

I looked out of the window about an hour ago to see our cat sitting in a random snowdrift, bolt upright with her tail curled around her legs and looking very stoical. A catly exercise in the subjugation of desire? Perhaps.

About half an hour ago I opened the front door and Tuppence came whizzing indoors as if she had popped out of a shotgun. I am sorry to say that she spent the next twenty minutes licking her derriere. One can only imagine she was trying to thaw it out again.

How Cold it is Here; or, Another Look at the Evils of Procrastination

When we brought home the detergent (Cheer with color guard) from Walmart, it wasn't immediately needed. So I forgot, and left it in the car. Today, I needed it. Went outside to bring it in, and lo, it is frozen solid.

Here and There, Now and Then

Just an odd assortment:

Nelly pranced by me today and I patted her head. It was crunchy, and a strong smell of hairspray diffused itself in her wake. So that was why the bottle was almost empty earlier...

***

Daddy was snuggling Inge before bed and simultaneously having a moment of poignant reflection. "Are you really six?" he asked. A muffled voice replied, "I've been six for at least a month already."

***

Nelly greeted me before church (after shower and clothes, and actually before makeup and hair) with this heartening salutation: "Oh, Mommy, you look myoootiful. You're wearing makeup, aren't you?"

And Nelly prayed tonight for many, many things. In one of her final sentences she prayed rather notably for Uganda, and for Norf America, and that Mommy would keep on wearing makeup--in that order.

***

A conversation with Inge and Lewis:

Me, introducing one of those mindbenders parents just love to bring up and discuss--

You know, Lewis, when you're grown up and married and have your own little boy, it will be pretty fun to bring Clark (the bear) out, and explain that he used to be yours when you were little. Lewis, hitherto conversable, balked at this and a mulish look overspread his face.

Lewis: I don't want to get married. I mean, I don't want to get married to anyone else.

Me: What do you mean?

Lewis: I'll just get married to Inge.

(Now this is remarkable and we can only assume he's a bit of a glutton for punishment--either that or he doesn't yet understand that most of us are looking for some level of mutuality in an indissoluble relationship of that sort.)

Me: But you can't do that.

Lewis, who had been told before, nevertheless looking stymied. Assuming I had misunderstood: "I mean when I grow up."

Me: Nope, still can't do that.

Lewis: Well, I don't want to get married. I won't get married.

Inge: I know, Lewis! You could be a monk.

Me, interested: What's a monk, Inge?

Inge: Oh, you know. One of those guys that live in a...(looking a trifle unsure)...in a...nunnery.

Lewis: I think I'll just grow up and be a boarder. Yep, that's what I'll do; I'll be a boarder.

Me: Oh, so you want to go away to college?

Lewis--clearly not suffering from any untoward attachment to home and family: "Yeah." Then thoughtfully elaborating further, "I want to go to school so I can play at the park."

Me, enlightened: At the park.

Lewis: Yeah. Maybe when I'm six. Or seven or eight.

Money Bomb #3

Yes, it is that time again. Ron Paul Money Bomb #3 is today. Are you disgusted with government and politics as usual? Go vote with your pocketbook... don't let this rare opportunity pass you by, to vote for a guy who won't sell his soul and believes that the federal government should obey the law placed over it--the constitution.

www.ronpaul2008.com

Prime Time Nelly

That just about says it all

Thanks to my persistently hardworking husband, we have a handsome wood stove snuggled into the arch of our once-open fireplace. Some day when we are all grown up and have a well-insulated house complete with central heating mechanisms from this century, I know the thought of these chilly winter mornings (frost and icicles and snowbanks) where the stove sits like a glowing coal in the room, and the sound of cracking logs is the warmest sound you'll ever hear, will be a lovely memory.

Inge sometimes helps to build the fire; and she's just about good enough at it to do it herself, so sometimes, especially on those mornings when we just aren't feeling quite full of zip and morale, we let her try first. She knows the procedure: first the wad or two of phone book pages; then the little teepee of sticks and chips; and finally, get Daddy to light a match, not forgetting to open the damper. The other day she interrupted the process to bring a piece of phonebook under our scrutiny--a not-wadded-up piece, a beautiful, two-tone print job. "This one," she announced, "is too nice to burn. So where did ya wanna save it?"

Home Again

Christmas Videos

Christmas Photos

Matching Christmas Clothes

There are more Christmas family pictures as my new photo-hosting site. If you want to see the all 700 of the best of 2007 (still trying to edit that down). Feel free to email me and ask for the password.